1 00:00:07,779 --> 00:00:10,580 Because when it comes to finishing ghosts' 2 00:00:10,581 --> 00:00:14,244 unfinished business, our business is "boo-ming." 3 00:00:14,248 --> 00:00:16,237 Ahem, and with the help of your investment, 4 00:00:16,238 --> 00:00:18,934 we can take this thing all the way to the top. 5 00:00:20,933 --> 00:00:22,891 But how? B-but how? 6 00:00:22,892 --> 00:00:24,542 Very good question. 7 00:00:24,543 --> 00:00:29,650 We're going to invest your money using a very robust three-point business plan. 8 00:00:29,653 --> 00:00:31,333 Point number one, 9 00:00:31,334 --> 00:00:32,980 - matching uniforms. - Obviously. 10 00:00:33,005 --> 00:00:34,443 Number two, 11 00:00:34,468 --> 00:00:37,875 - spend money to make money! - Spend money to make money! 12 00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:40,789 And number three... 13 00:00:40,790 --> 00:00:41,999 - Marketing. - We all know 14 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:43,464 that skywriter planes are the most 15 00:00:43,465 --> 00:00:45,621 effective marketing tool in the sky today. 16 00:00:45,622 --> 00:00:46,701 You put something in the air, 17 00:00:46,702 --> 00:00:48,402 - I'm gonna see it. - But, dang it, Clyde, 18 00:00:48,427 --> 00:00:50,416 planes are so expensive! 19 00:00:51,046 --> 00:00:54,426 Ah, if only there were a way to make airborne messaging more affordable. 20 00:00:54,427 --> 00:00:57,397 What if I told you there was? 21 00:00:59,407 --> 00:01:01,099 "Pigeonvertising"! 22 00:01:01,100 --> 00:01:03,158 Birds in T-shirts. 23 00:01:03,159 --> 00:01:04,752 Guys, you want my honest opinion? 24 00:01:04,777 --> 00:01:05,539 Yes, please. 25 00:01:05,564 --> 00:01:07,826 You're beating off the wrong tree, all right? 26 00:01:07,827 --> 00:01:10,686 I mean, even if I saw the bird wearing the shirt, 27 00:01:10,687 --> 00:01:14,676 I don't think I'd care 'cause it's... it's fucking stupid, you know? 28 00:01:14,677 --> 00:01:16,696 Uh-huh. Yeah. No, I had that thought. 29 00:01:16,697 --> 00:01:17,776 No, you said you liked the T-shirts. 30 00:01:17,777 --> 00:01:20,746 Well, no. I said that I liked tank tops. 31 00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:22,702 It doesn't have shoulders. It's a fucking bird. 32 00:01:22,703 --> 00:01:24,219 Clyde, how many times do we have to go over this? 33 00:01:24,220 --> 00:01:25,297 Are you kidding me? 34 00:01:25,298 --> 00:01:26,337 Where are the fucking shoulders? 35 00:01:26,338 --> 00:01:28,297 Guys, guys. 36 00:01:28,298 --> 00:01:30,197 I'm sorry. 37 00:01:30,198 --> 00:01:31,267 I'm out. 38 00:01:31,268 --> 00:01:33,147 - Ah. - But... 39 00:01:33,148 --> 00:01:36,227 I will give you my best business advice. 40 00:01:36,228 --> 00:01:39,257 - Go bigger. - That's good. Do you have a pen? 41 00:01:39,258 --> 00:01:41,207 That's the motto for my new dildo line. 42 00:01:41,208 --> 00:01:43,187 It's the way I live my life. 43 00:01:43,321 --> 00:01:46,390 All right. I've had over 97 casts taken of my dick 44 00:01:46,415 --> 00:01:49,245 in the past three days, and I'll be honest with you, 45 00:01:49,246 --> 00:01:55,044 the first one was pretty damn near perfect, but I said go bigger. 46 00:01:55,045 --> 00:01:56,725 You wanna play the game at my level? 47 00:01:56,726 --> 00:01:59,625 You gotta get your dicks out and show the world 48 00:01:59,626 --> 00:02:00,755 how you fuck. 49 00:02:00,780 --> 00:02:02,915 And by that, I mean get a high-profile case 50 00:02:02,916 --> 00:02:03,984 that makes headlines. 51 00:02:04,032 --> 00:02:06,900 Oh. Yeah. Shit. Yeah. Okay, yep. No, good call. 52 00:02:06,901 --> 00:02:08,609 That's another way to go. 53 00:02:17,067 --> 00:02:20,448 - Synced and corrected by hawken45 - - www.addic7ed.com - 54 00:02:43,695 --> 00:02:46,270 Mr. Pacalioglu, welcome to San Damien Prison. 55 00:02:46,525 --> 00:02:48,159 You didn't have any trouble getting here, did you? 56 00:02:48,234 --> 00:02:49,293 No, no, no, no. No, the, uh... 57 00:02:49,318 --> 00:02:51,247 the guards made quite the spectacle 58 00:02:51,248 --> 00:02:52,267 of my arrival at the front gate, 59 00:02:52,268 --> 00:02:53,513 but my pants are back on now 60 00:02:53,538 --> 00:02:55,744 and I'm, uh... I'm feeling good. 61 00:02:55,769 --> 00:02:58,778 Listen, as I mentioned in my email, I don't have a lot of money in the budget. 62 00:02:58,779 --> 00:03:00,298 - Mm-hmm. - But I'm hoping this case 63 00:03:00,299 --> 00:03:02,055 could be some decent exposure for you. 64 00:03:02,056 --> 00:03:04,543 I don't wanna say we're "the" celebrity prison but... 65 00:03:05,345 --> 00:03:07,436 any rapist or murderer whose name you would know 66 00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:08,566 has come through here at some point. 67 00:03:08,567 --> 00:03:10,496 That is exactly the kind of case I'm looking for. 68 00:03:10,497 --> 00:03:12,507 So, uh, do you mind telling me what's going on? 69 00:03:13,597 --> 00:03:15,516 Cell doors opening on their own. 70 00:03:15,517 --> 00:03:16,606 Mm-hmm. 71 00:03:16,983 --> 00:03:20,442 Floating markers drawing penises on my guards' faces. 72 00:03:20,443 --> 00:03:21,542 Got it. Okay. 73 00:03:21,543 --> 00:03:23,177 Very interesting. 74 00:03:23,178 --> 00:03:24,237 Okay, do you mind showing me 75 00:03:24,238 --> 00:03:25,247 where the haunting has occurred? 76 00:03:26,035 --> 00:03:28,123 Mm-hmm. I see. 77 00:03:28,346 --> 00:03:31,465 I'm not sure if it's meant to be threatening or sensual. 78 00:03:31,490 --> 00:03:32,590 Hush, hush, hush, hush. 79 00:03:34,358 --> 00:03:37,218 Okay, now we can clean it off. 80 00:03:42,188 --> 00:03:44,183 Oh. 81 00:03:44,184 --> 00:03:46,203 - Excuse me. - Hi. 82 00:03:46,228 --> 00:03:50,197 What is a beautiful woman like you doing in a place like this? 83 00:03:50,198 --> 00:03:52,237 - Uh, you can see me? - Yeah. 84 00:03:52,513 --> 00:03:53,652 I can. What... what do you got there? 85 00:03:53,677 --> 00:03:55,576 You got a hummingbird on your boo... your breast? 86 00:03:55,577 --> 00:03:58,091 I'm dead, dude, and hard-core lesbian. 87 00:03:58,092 --> 00:04:00,111 Oh! No, no, no. I'm not... I'm not hitting on you. 88 00:04:00,112 --> 00:04:01,719 I'm not even sure how to do that, really. 89 00:04:01,744 --> 00:04:05,022 I just... just admiring your hummingbird tattoo, honestly. 90 00:04:05,023 --> 00:04:07,294 Um, I have 67 tattoos on my body. 91 00:04:07,319 --> 00:04:10,060 You like the one generic one on my tit? 92 00:04:10,759 --> 00:04:13,715 Okay, I feel like maybe we got off on the wrong tit here, 93 00:04:13,740 --> 00:04:15,779 so I'm just gonna... I'm gonna take it back. 94 00:04:15,780 --> 00:04:17,477 I'm trying to figure out what you're doing here, 95 00:04:17,478 --> 00:04:18,687 if you have any unfinished business 96 00:04:18,712 --> 00:04:20,248 that I can help you with of any kind. 97 00:04:20,249 --> 00:04:22,175 I was in the middle of inking someone when I died. 98 00:04:22,200 --> 00:04:23,891 I can't leave that canvas unfinished. 99 00:04:23,892 --> 00:04:25,961 Okay, tattoo. Easy-peasy. 100 00:04:25,962 --> 00:04:29,204 - Got it. Let's go. - It's a very special tattoo. 101 00:04:29,205 --> 00:04:30,352 A windmill. 102 00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:32,352 Owen, my canvas, 103 00:04:32,353 --> 00:04:35,232 he grew up by a windmill on the shores of Cape Cod. 104 00:04:35,312 --> 00:04:37,441 He played by it every day with his brother. 105 00:04:38,106 --> 00:04:39,713 He wanted that tattoo to commemorate 106 00:04:39,714 --> 00:04:42,484 the happiest time of his life before things got tough. 107 00:04:43,466 --> 00:04:44,585 Before he ended up here. 108 00:04:44,674 --> 00:04:46,005 Cool. 109 00:04:46,176 --> 00:04:47,719 Windmill. Got it. Let's go. 110 00:04:47,744 --> 00:04:50,783 I guess I saw a piece of myself in that tattoo. 111 00:04:51,030 --> 00:04:54,723 Sure, I've said that about a lot of tattoos, but this one was... 112 00:04:54,724 --> 00:04:56,713 - different. - Still talking? 113 00:04:56,714 --> 00:04:58,329 - Innocent. - Fine. 114 00:04:58,330 --> 00:05:00,368 - Pure like... - Come on. 115 00:05:00,369 --> 00:05:04,055 Mozart or Shakespeare 116 00:05:05,389 --> 00:05:06,319 or Patti Smith. 117 00:05:06,320 --> 00:05:07,468 Are you still talking?! 118 00:05:07,469 --> 00:05:10,268 Well, she's a bit of a motormouth, inked-up dink, 119 00:05:10,269 --> 00:05:12,757 but, uh, the job seems pretty straightforward, fortunately. 120 00:05:12,782 --> 00:05:14,497 All I have to do is get this Owen guy out, 121 00:05:14,498 --> 00:05:16,195 finish his tattoo, she'll go into her light, 122 00:05:16,196 --> 00:05:17,995 and Bob's your uncle, we're back in business. 123 00:05:18,020 --> 00:05:19,266 - Oh, perfect. - Yeah. 124 00:05:19,719 --> 00:05:21,808 - One small problem. - Okay. 125 00:05:22,032 --> 00:05:23,256 We can't just take an inmate out, 126 00:05:23,257 --> 00:05:25,216 give them a tattoo, and then stick them back in 127 00:05:25,217 --> 00:05:26,276 because he's gonna look like a rat. 128 00:05:26,277 --> 00:05:27,296 Oh, okay. Well, you know, 129 00:05:27,297 --> 00:05:28,698 the tricky thing about ghosts 130 00:05:28,723 --> 00:05:30,662 is that they wants what they wants. 131 00:05:30,663 --> 00:05:34,293 Mm, can't take him out, so we'll just send you in. 132 00:05:35,653 --> 00:05:39,632 That seems more complicated than the words made it sound. 133 00:05:39,633 --> 00:05:40,722 Damn it. 134 00:05:43,573 --> 00:05:45,542 And this is where you'll be staying. 135 00:05:45,543 --> 00:05:46,642 And this is Giovanni. 136 00:05:46,643 --> 00:05:49,532 He is as non-violent as they come. 137 00:05:49,533 --> 00:05:51,622 Just a very mediocre bank robber. 138 00:05:51,623 --> 00:05:53,512 Hi, I'm Pac. 139 00:05:53,513 --> 00:05:54,672 Pac, pleasure to meet you. 140 00:05:54,673 --> 00:05:56,331 - Yeah. - And what else? 141 00:05:56,332 --> 00:05:58,684 Uh, oh, gym time's in 10. 142 00:05:59,169 --> 00:06:00,401 And I think that's everything. 143 00:06:00,402 --> 00:06:02,311 Holler if you need me. 144 00:06:02,312 --> 00:06:04,282 Yeah, yeah. Oh, shit. 145 00:06:06,947 --> 00:06:08,895 First time? You seem nervous. 146 00:06:08,951 --> 00:06:10,717 Uh, yeah, I've, ahem, 147 00:06:11,027 --> 00:06:12,297 been in holding cells, for sure, 148 00:06:12,298 --> 00:06:14,296 but, uh, you know, this is definitely more... 149 00:06:14,298 --> 00:06:16,216 full-on incarceration than I'm used to. 150 00:06:16,217 --> 00:06:18,203 Well, the good thing about prison 151 00:06:18,228 --> 00:06:20,277 is you have all the time to figure it out. 152 00:06:20,278 --> 00:06:22,217 Look at me, 42, 153 00:06:22,218 --> 00:06:23,387 - learning how to read. - Good for you, man. 154 00:06:23,388 --> 00:06:25,247 That's, uh... that's a good attitude. 155 00:06:25,248 --> 00:06:27,267 Attitude's all we got. 156 00:06:27,578 --> 00:06:29,265 Now, if you'll excuse me, 157 00:06:29,290 --> 00:06:33,096 I'm just under a month away from finishing chapter two. 158 00:06:33,097 --> 00:06:35,401 Yeah, okay. Yeah, don't let me stop you. 159 00:06:36,130 --> 00:06:38,465 Chapter two is the best. 160 00:06:39,117 --> 00:06:40,684 Ah! What the fuck are you doing? 161 00:06:40,709 --> 00:06:41,808 What? I was just... 162 00:06:41,809 --> 00:06:43,718 - Huh? - I was just gonna take a pee. 163 00:06:43,719 --> 00:06:45,369 No! Don't pee in the toilet. 164 00:06:45,370 --> 00:06:46,439 That's where I make my toilet wine. 165 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:47,971 Pee in the sink like a normal person. 166 00:06:47,972 --> 00:06:49,889 Jesus, what the hell's wrong with you? 167 00:06:49,914 --> 00:06:51,008 They arrest you for being stupid? 168 00:06:51,009 --> 00:06:52,048 No! 169 00:06:53,167 --> 00:06:55,755 Just kidding. But seriously, pee in the sink. 170 00:06:55,756 --> 00:06:56,844 Okay. 171 00:06:56,845 --> 00:06:58,784 "Pant-i-yes. 172 00:06:58,785 --> 00:07:00,725 Panties. Pa..." 173 00:07:01,989 --> 00:07:05,162 "Panties. Pulled down my panties." 174 00:07:08,895 --> 00:07:11,725 Let's go, let's go, let's go! 175 00:07:14,825 --> 00:07:16,171 Yeah, I mean, that's basically it. 176 00:07:16,172 --> 00:07:17,240 Yeah, it's a windmill. 177 00:07:17,241 --> 00:07:18,300 I know what a windmill looks like. 178 00:07:18,301 --> 00:07:20,200 Okay, but that's not really... 179 00:07:20,201 --> 00:07:22,699 - Oh, whatever. Where's the guy? - Over there. 180 00:07:24,201 --> 00:07:26,504 See? I barely even got those fan blades started. 181 00:07:26,505 --> 00:07:27,931 It's just an unfinished mess. 182 00:07:28,102 --> 00:07:29,053 Is that a windmill? 183 00:07:29,054 --> 00:07:31,278 Yeah! See, I mean, you can't even fucking tell. 184 00:07:31,303 --> 00:07:32,352 It's humiliating. 185 00:07:32,353 --> 00:07:33,482 Way to go, baby. Give it to him. 186 00:07:33,483 --> 00:07:36,302 - Hurry up. - The fuck are you looking at? 187 00:07:37,045 --> 00:07:39,125 Oh, no. Don't worry. He's a really gentle guy. 188 00:07:39,126 --> 00:07:40,235 It's just the system has changed him. 189 00:07:40,236 --> 00:07:42,206 Pussy. 190 00:07:46,335 --> 00:07:49,802 I'm just saying that maybe your unfinished windmill 191 00:07:49,827 --> 00:07:51,826 is his finished swastika. 192 00:07:51,827 --> 00:07:53,278 What? Swastika? 193 00:07:53,279 --> 00:07:55,328 No, those are the sun-soaked fan blades 194 00:07:55,329 --> 00:07:57,937 of a happy windmill... innocent and pure. 195 00:07:57,962 --> 00:07:59,278 Okay. 196 00:07:59,279 --> 00:08:00,358 I mean, if you don't finish it, 197 00:08:00,359 --> 00:08:03,298 yeah, it looks a little... swastik-y. 198 00:08:03,299 --> 00:08:05,298 All right. 199 00:08:05,299 --> 00:08:06,419 I'm just saying. 200 00:08:09,744 --> 00:08:11,872 Whoo. Hello, hey, brothers. What are you watching, huh? 201 00:08:11,873 --> 00:08:13,862 Oh, shit! Whoa! 202 00:08:13,863 --> 00:08:15,812 I'm sorry. Oh, shit! 203 00:08:15,813 --> 00:08:17,782 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry about that. 204 00:08:17,783 --> 00:08:19,565 That is my bad and I am gonna fix it. 205 00:08:19,566 --> 00:08:21,614 Look at this. Oh, shit, it's that thing 206 00:08:21,615 --> 00:08:23,514 where the prong is bent in the wrong direction. 207 00:08:23,515 --> 00:08:25,664 Bend it back and I... I'll plug it in. 208 00:08:25,665 --> 00:08:27,634 Just give me a couple seconds here. I can do it. 209 00:08:27,635 --> 00:08:30,454 Shit! No, that's gonna break. 210 00:08:31,983 --> 00:08:34,912 How... how fucking white are we, right? 211 00:08:34,913 --> 00:08:36,339 So fucking white, man! 212 00:08:36,340 --> 00:08:37,399 You could shut off the lights in this room 213 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:38,439 and everything would still glow. 214 00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:40,319 You know what I mean? 215 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:41,469 I should go. I should probably go. 216 00:08:41,470 --> 00:08:44,339 You fuck with me time, you live on borrowed time. 217 00:08:44,340 --> 00:08:45,519 - White power. - White power! 218 00:08:47,062 --> 00:08:48,463 Back in your cells. Let's go. 219 00:08:48,488 --> 00:08:50,176 - Back through here? - Yep. 220 00:08:50,510 --> 00:08:52,357 Okay, cool. Wow, that escalated quick, huh? 221 00:08:52,358 --> 00:08:54,008 Yeah. Yeah. 222 00:08:54,009 --> 00:08:56,025 That's kind of the way it works in here. 223 00:08:56,050 --> 00:08:57,321 Yeah, I'm getting that. 224 00:08:57,322 --> 00:08:58,992 Yeah, you want my advice, 225 00:08:58,993 --> 00:09:01,293 you lay low, you be your own best friend. 226 00:09:01,318 --> 00:09:04,193 Oh, it's just I need to get to Owen somehow, you know? 227 00:09:04,218 --> 00:09:05,865 He's surrounded by his Nazi buddies 228 00:09:05,866 --> 00:09:07,765 and I just... I don't think they like me very much. 229 00:09:07,766 --> 00:09:09,851 - Nah, they don't. - Fuck. 230 00:09:09,876 --> 00:09:12,549 Gotta get him alone, you know, or send him a message. 231 00:09:12,550 --> 00:09:13,834 Can you send people messages in here? 232 00:09:13,835 --> 00:09:16,146 Well, you know, I might be able to help. 233 00:09:16,234 --> 00:09:17,566 - Really? - Mm-hmm. 234 00:09:17,591 --> 00:09:21,154 Of course, in here we trade favors for favors. 235 00:09:21,155 --> 00:09:22,264 Oh, sure, sure, sure! Yeah, anything. 236 00:09:22,265 --> 00:09:25,389 Well, I mean, not anything, 237 00:09:25,414 --> 00:09:26,780 but, you know, within reason. 238 00:09:26,805 --> 00:09:27,865 What did you have in mind? 239 00:09:31,364 --> 00:09:32,383 Read to me? 240 00:09:32,384 --> 00:09:33,384 Read to you? 241 00:09:34,444 --> 00:09:37,413 - So I will just read. - Mm-hmm. 242 00:09:37,414 --> 00:09:39,004 Do you have anywhere in particular you want me to start? 243 00:09:39,029 --> 00:09:41,379 - No. Anywhere is fine. - Okay. 244 00:09:41,404 --> 00:09:43,503 Just snuggle in and read. Here we go. 245 00:09:43,504 --> 00:09:45,463 Okay. 246 00:09:45,464 --> 00:09:49,353 "Mr. Green unlatched the velvet strap from her heels" 247 00:09:49,354 --> 00:09:51,473 and quietly removed the shoes from her feet. 248 00:09:51,734 --> 00:09:53,733 He was"... what's that noise? 249 00:09:53,758 --> 00:09:55,343 Hmm? Nothing. 250 00:09:55,344 --> 00:09:56,393 Keep reading. 251 00:09:56,394 --> 00:09:57,403 You're a really good reader. 252 00:09:57,404 --> 00:09:58,463 - I am? - Yeah. 253 00:09:58,464 --> 00:09:59,493 - Awesome. - Thanks, man. 254 00:09:59,494 --> 00:10:02,102 - Yeah. - Okay. 255 00:10:02,103 --> 00:10:03,827 - Mm-hmm. - "sniffing at her toes" 256 00:10:03,852 --> 00:10:06,395 as he bit his lip and quietly removed his pants." 257 00:10:06,396 --> 00:10:08,162 It's that. That sound right there. Do you hear that? 258 00:10:08,163 --> 00:10:09,707 - Huh? I don't know. - You don't hear that? 259 00:10:09,732 --> 00:10:12,447 No. It's jail. Sounds like jail. 260 00:10:12,448 --> 00:10:14,607 - Just read. - Jail sounds crazy. 261 00:10:14,608 --> 00:10:16,547 Okay. 262 00:10:17,571 --> 00:10:20,563 See? Bird shirts is a good idea, Danny. 263 00:10:25,498 --> 00:10:27,457 Uh... 264 00:10:27,458 --> 00:10:29,023 oh, wing holes! 265 00:10:29,024 --> 00:10:31,033 Fuck me, wing holes! 266 00:10:31,034 --> 00:10:32,034 Sorry, bird. 267 00:10:33,254 --> 00:10:35,063 Oh, he's alone. 268 00:10:35,064 --> 00:10:37,023 Uh, hey. Hi, sorry. 269 00:10:37,024 --> 00:10:38,545 I just... I'm... excuse me. 270 00:10:38,570 --> 00:10:40,459 Sorry, diabetic coming through. 271 00:10:40,460 --> 00:10:42,459 I just need... I have low blood sugar. 272 00:10:42,460 --> 00:10:44,008 I gotta... I gotta talk to this guy. 273 00:10:44,033 --> 00:10:46,002 Excuse me. Hey. Hey, man. 274 00:10:46,003 --> 00:10:47,541 What's up? It's Owen, right? 275 00:10:47,542 --> 00:10:49,029 Better back the fuck off, man. 276 00:10:49,030 --> 00:10:50,773 Hey, so listen, I'm really sorry about earlier. 277 00:10:50,774 --> 00:10:53,651 I ain't looking for no friends, you fake-white doughboy motherfucker. 278 00:10:53,652 --> 00:10:55,039 Okay, I'll cut the small talk. 279 00:10:55,040 --> 00:10:56,641 I'm here about a tattoo. 280 00:10:56,666 --> 00:10:59,615 I... fucking shit! 281 00:10:59,616 --> 00:11:01,605 Windmill. Windmill. Shores of Cape Cod. 282 00:11:01,606 --> 00:11:02,675 You used to play with your little brother. 283 00:11:02,676 --> 00:11:04,665 Happiest time of your life. 284 00:11:04,666 --> 00:11:06,015 Where the fuck did you hear that? 285 00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:08,969 If you remove the fork from my hand, I'll gladly tell you. 286 00:11:09,223 --> 00:11:10,322 Ah, thank God. 287 00:11:10,323 --> 00:11:12,282 - Okay, so... - Shh, shh, shh, shh. 288 00:11:12,283 --> 00:11:13,432 Go eat lunch. 289 00:11:13,433 --> 00:11:16,228 Wait for my signal, then meet me in the bathroom. 290 00:11:16,229 --> 00:11:18,218 If anyone asks, we're talking about raping you, all right? 291 00:11:18,243 --> 00:11:19,555 Fantastic. 292 00:11:19,580 --> 00:11:21,775 Okay. Is that pudding? 293 00:11:23,876 --> 00:11:25,805 He gets fucking pulled over by the cops. 294 00:11:25,806 --> 00:11:27,765 I mean, the guy's dead. 295 00:11:27,766 --> 00:11:29,755 Are you sure you're even white, dude? 296 00:11:34,686 --> 00:11:35,835 That was for you, Pac! 297 00:11:35,836 --> 00:11:37,855 Riot! 298 00:11:37,856 --> 00:11:39,875 No. 299 00:11:45,806 --> 00:11:47,776 You're fucking dead! 300 00:11:53,866 --> 00:11:55,745 All right, bunk check! 301 00:11:55,746 --> 00:11:57,715 Everybody back in their fucking cells! 302 00:11:57,716 --> 00:12:00,675 Yeah, that's good. How do we get back? 303 00:12:00,676 --> 00:12:02,696 This way? Okay. Excuse me. 304 00:12:04,856 --> 00:12:07,541 - Why did you shank him? - You wanted to send a message! 305 00:12:07,542 --> 00:12:09,611 - Yeah, not that message! - W-what kind of message? 306 00:12:09,612 --> 00:12:11,581 I'd like to finish your tattoo. 307 00:12:11,756 --> 00:12:13,965 - I don't have a tattoo. - No, that was the message! 308 00:12:13,990 --> 00:12:16,390 Oh. You could've just told me that. 309 00:12:16,391 --> 00:12:17,460 No shit. 310 00:12:17,461 --> 00:12:19,107 Hey there. Don't let it scare you. 311 00:12:19,108 --> 00:12:20,955 These things are like rain in Miami. 312 00:12:20,980 --> 00:12:22,277 - Okay. - It'll pass. 313 00:12:22,278 --> 00:12:23,297 So, here's what we're gonna do... 314 00:12:24,378 --> 00:12:27,257 - Oh, God! - Oh, shit! Oh, my God. 315 00:12:27,258 --> 00:12:29,197 No, no, no, no, no! 316 00:12:29,198 --> 00:12:31,327 Jesus! Can one of you open the door, please? 317 00:12:31,328 --> 00:12:33,187 A little help over here! 318 00:12:33,188 --> 00:12:34,338 A little help. Hey, buddy, a little help? 319 00:12:38,238 --> 00:12:40,347 Mr. Warden? 320 00:12:40,348 --> 00:12:42,207 Sir, can you hear me? 321 00:12:42,208 --> 00:12:44,217 I need your keys so I can go home. 322 00:12:44,218 --> 00:12:46,213 Hey! What about my tattoo? 323 00:12:46,214 --> 00:12:48,514 Oh, you know what? I would love to finish your tattoo, 324 00:12:48,539 --> 00:12:51,131 but I'm right smack-dab in the middle of a race riot right now, so... 325 00:12:51,132 --> 00:12:52,642 unless you know of a better way to get out of here. 326 00:12:53,152 --> 00:12:54,526 I know a way out. 327 00:12:54,527 --> 00:12:55,616 So I'm gonna need you to dig around 328 00:12:55,617 --> 00:12:56,686 in those pockets of yours and hand me 329 00:12:56,687 --> 00:12:57,894 whatever keys I need to get going. 330 00:12:57,895 --> 00:12:59,260 I never bring my keys to a riot. 331 00:12:59,285 --> 00:13:01,154 That would make me their first target. 332 00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:02,274 - Yeah. - But don't worry. 333 00:13:02,275 --> 00:13:04,244 - I got a better plan. - Uh, I bet you don't. 334 00:13:04,648 --> 00:13:05,314 Prison break. 335 00:13:06,043 --> 00:13:09,835 It's the only way for me to finish the job I started when I came to this place. 336 00:13:09,836 --> 00:13:11,705 We've been underfunded for 25 years 337 00:13:11,706 --> 00:13:13,614 and the politicians don't give a damn. 338 00:13:13,616 --> 00:13:15,385 But if an inmate were to escape, 339 00:13:15,386 --> 00:13:18,483 especially one as out of shape and unimpressive as you, 340 00:13:18,484 --> 00:13:20,995 well, now that sends a message they can't ignore. 341 00:13:20,996 --> 00:13:22,142 Oh, I bet it would. 342 00:13:22,167 --> 00:13:25,184 I feel like this plan is a little bit more insulting than the last one. 343 00:13:25,185 --> 00:13:26,955 As long as it gets me to that tattoo, 344 00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:29,049 - I'm in. - Are you serious? 345 00:13:29,050 --> 00:13:30,979 You know what? Fuck you guys. 346 00:13:30,980 --> 00:13:32,895 Fuck your tattoo. Fuck your stupid plans. 347 00:13:32,896 --> 00:13:35,691 You make it sound so simple and then it's Nazis and neck stabs all day long. 348 00:13:35,692 --> 00:13:37,631 - Pac! - What? Oh! 349 00:13:37,632 --> 00:13:39,701 Snap out of it! You're talking to empty hallways, man! 350 00:13:39,702 --> 00:13:40,778 You're letting prison get to you! 351 00:13:40,779 --> 00:13:42,139 Giovanni, I appreciate where you're coming from, 352 00:13:42,164 --> 00:13:44,053 but right now, I really need you to let me do my thing, okay? 353 00:13:44,054 --> 00:13:45,993 Fuck you! I'm in. Break me out. 354 00:13:45,994 --> 00:13:49,083 Perfect. We'll do it all with simple household objects. 355 00:14:06,934 --> 00:14:08,044 Who's Allen? 356 00:14:14,008 --> 00:14:15,078 Oh, an Allen wrench. 357 00:14:23,481 --> 00:14:25,490 Here you go. Get that scent. 358 00:14:25,515 --> 00:14:26,614 Now go to Pac. 359 00:14:34,028 --> 00:14:36,978 Hey, I'm having a little indigestion. 360 00:14:40,878 --> 00:14:43,827 The carrier pigeon is in flight. 361 00:14:43,828 --> 00:14:45,868 Great. What's next? 362 00:14:47,233 --> 00:14:48,706 Next, we wait for nightfall. 363 00:14:49,543 --> 00:14:51,107 Help! There's something wrong with him! 364 00:14:52,928 --> 00:14:54,957 He just started vomiting at the puss. 365 00:14:55,998 --> 00:14:57,887 I'm sorry! I'm sorry. 366 00:14:57,888 --> 00:14:59,017 Thank you for your service. 367 00:14:59,018 --> 00:15:00,937 Okay, okay. 368 00:15:00,962 --> 00:15:02,048 You sure you don't wanna come with me? 369 00:15:02,049 --> 00:15:04,198 No. I belong here. 370 00:15:04,199 --> 00:15:07,068 But you keep up your end of the deal. 371 00:15:07,069 --> 00:15:08,169 I will. 372 00:15:11,109 --> 00:15:13,048 Promise me, Pac. 373 00:15:13,049 --> 00:15:16,049 - Promise me! - I promise! 374 00:15:21,159 --> 00:15:23,138 Oh, shit, it worked. 375 00:15:23,139 --> 00:15:25,038 Like a Swiss fucking watch. 376 00:15:25,039 --> 00:15:27,078 Fuck, shit! 377 00:15:27,578 --> 00:15:28,703 Fuck. 378 00:15:29,292 --> 00:15:30,472 Hey. Hey. 379 00:15:33,129 --> 00:15:35,118 - Psst, psst, psst, psst. - Come here. 380 00:15:35,119 --> 00:15:36,711 Fuck. 381 00:15:36,712 --> 00:15:38,741 God, I wish I had something to feed you. I... 382 00:15:40,028 --> 00:15:41,208 Hang on a tick. 383 00:15:41,752 --> 00:15:43,709 Hey, hey, hey, hey. 384 00:15:43,710 --> 00:15:46,188 You like Seltza-Fizz? 385 00:15:46,213 --> 00:15:48,132 Huh? 386 00:15:48,133 --> 00:15:50,192 Want a little Seltzy? A little Fizzy? Huh? 387 00:15:50,193 --> 00:15:53,212 Yeah. It's kind of like a shitty Halloween candy, right? 388 00:15:53,213 --> 00:15:55,152 Go for it, come on. Oh. 389 00:15:55,153 --> 00:15:56,312 Oh, something's... 390 00:15:56,313 --> 00:15:58,272 Oh! 391 00:16:00,123 --> 00:16:02,202 Right. That's what happens 392 00:16:02,203 --> 00:16:04,212 when you feed Seltza-Fizz to a bird. 393 00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:06,123 Shit. Oh. 394 00:16:08,123 --> 00:16:10,112 I'm sorry. Thank you for your service. 395 00:16:14,193 --> 00:16:16,112 Hey, here comes the easy part. 396 00:16:16,113 --> 00:16:18,102 Use those keys to get into the guards' bathroom. 397 00:16:18,103 --> 00:16:20,122 Go to the second stall under the floor bolts 398 00:16:20,123 --> 00:16:21,152 - and remove the toilet. - Wait, 399 00:16:21,153 --> 00:16:22,202 I'm going through a toilet? 400 00:16:22,203 --> 00:16:23,322 It's the biggest pipe we have 401 00:16:23,323 --> 00:16:26,132 and it's our best chance 402 00:16:26,133 --> 00:16:27,793 of squeezing this pig through the straw 403 00:16:27,818 --> 00:16:29,787 - if you know what I mean. - Yeah, the fat comments 404 00:16:29,788 --> 00:16:31,797 are coming through loud and clear, thank you very much. 405 00:16:31,798 --> 00:16:33,837 - Oh, shit! - I'm gonna fuck you 406 00:16:33,838 --> 00:16:36,697 - through these bars! - I don't consent to that! 407 00:16:41,828 --> 00:16:43,748 Get back here, you fucking cocktease! 408 00:16:54,223 --> 00:16:55,393 Let's do this. 409 00:17:17,110 --> 00:17:18,200 Hello? 410 00:17:20,808 --> 00:17:22,797 Huh. 411 00:17:22,798 --> 00:17:24,667 Must be hearing ghost farts. 412 00:17:44,838 --> 00:17:46,717 Oh, sure, 413 00:17:46,718 --> 00:17:48,727 I'll take a high-profile case. 414 00:17:48,728 --> 00:17:49,827 Ah, yeah. 415 00:17:49,828 --> 00:17:52,187 Prison sounds like a great fucking idea. 416 00:17:52,188 --> 00:17:54,316 And then can I crawl through tunnels 417 00:17:54,318 --> 00:17:56,157 full of human shit 418 00:17:56,158 --> 00:17:57,347 while white people try and kill me? 419 00:17:57,348 --> 00:18:01,197 Oh, yeah, who doesn't fucking love that? 420 00:18:01,198 --> 00:18:02,307 This guy! I... 421 00:18:02,308 --> 00:18:04,297 Oh, oh, shit! 422 00:18:04,298 --> 00:18:07,157 Oh, God! Oh, I got shit in my mouth. 423 00:18:07,158 --> 00:18:09,177 Oh, that's definitely shit. 424 00:18:09,178 --> 00:18:10,357 Oh, fuck. 425 00:18:19,993 --> 00:18:21,993 Hey, guard, there's a prison break! 426 00:18:23,354 --> 00:18:25,333 Uh, we got a situation. 427 00:18:25,358 --> 00:18:27,347 Check the security of your cell block. 428 00:18:41,660 --> 00:18:42,792 Hey, I know that guy. 429 00:18:42,793 --> 00:18:45,517 Dump the body in the hole. Get in the bag. 430 00:18:45,542 --> 00:18:47,631 Oh, right. Yeah, okay. 431 00:18:47,632 --> 00:18:49,551 What hole? Dump it in what hole? 432 00:18:49,552 --> 00:18:51,920 Hey, asshole! I asked you for one thing. 433 00:18:51,945 --> 00:18:52,874 Okay, you know what? I'm just gonna 434 00:18:52,951 --> 00:18:54,849 make my way to freedom first and then we'll talk next steps. 435 00:18:54,874 --> 00:18:55,633 Oh, really? 436 00:18:55,658 --> 00:18:57,567 What if I make a bunch of noise? 437 00:18:57,592 --> 00:18:58,651 Don't, don't, don't, don't! Stop! 438 00:18:58,652 --> 00:19:00,621 Okay. Shh. Stop, stop. Okay. 439 00:19:00,622 --> 00:19:02,531 I'll finish the fucking tattoo. 440 00:19:02,533 --> 00:19:03,682 Wait a second. 441 00:19:03,683 --> 00:19:05,602 We don't have a tattoo gun. 442 00:19:05,603 --> 00:19:07,200 How were we gonna deal with that originally? 443 00:19:07,201 --> 00:19:09,712 It's a prison tat. You make it work. That's art. 444 00:19:09,737 --> 00:19:11,816 You start with an idea, you work with the reality, 445 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:15,636 and where the two meet, beauty is blossoming 446 00:19:15,637 --> 00:19:18,185 like a... like a tiny tangerine... 447 00:19:18,186 --> 00:19:19,844 Shh, okay, shut up. You're not even making sense anymore. 448 00:19:19,845 --> 00:19:20,944 - Well... - I figured it out. 449 00:19:22,136 --> 00:19:24,085 - Make a little incision here. - Oh... 450 00:19:24,086 --> 00:19:25,185 - Oh, fuck. - See, I wouldn't have 451 00:19:25,186 --> 00:19:27,025 done it that way. 452 00:19:27,026 --> 00:19:28,175 That's a lot more blood than I thought. 453 00:19:28,176 --> 00:19:30,314 - Okay. - Yeah... 454 00:19:30,315 --> 00:19:32,435 - You're like a five-year-old. - Hold on. Stop talking, please. 455 00:19:34,305 --> 00:19:35,993 Okay, look at that. Boom. Windmill. 456 00:19:36,018 --> 00:19:37,957 That looks like a penis with a fan on it. 457 00:19:37,958 --> 00:19:40,957 What? You clearly have not seen very many penises in your life. 458 00:19:40,958 --> 00:19:41,997 Look at it, it's a windmill! 459 00:19:41,998 --> 00:19:43,085 Ah. 460 00:19:43,086 --> 00:19:44,135 Okay, fine. Shut up. I'll make a door. 461 00:19:44,136 --> 00:19:45,215 Here we go. 462 00:19:46,232 --> 00:19:48,162 There we go. One door. 463 00:19:51,029 --> 00:19:53,473 Oh, yeah, yeah, now I see it. 464 00:19:53,474 --> 00:19:55,513 - Yeah? - It's different. 465 00:19:55,514 --> 00:19:57,374 I like it. 466 00:19:59,424 --> 00:20:00,563 - I love it. - Really? 467 00:20:00,564 --> 00:20:02,088 You guys like it? 468 00:20:02,113 --> 00:20:03,302 I mean, 469 00:20:03,564 --> 00:20:05,573 I usually consider myself more of a colorer than a drawer, 470 00:20:05,574 --> 00:20:08,503 but, you know, once you lock into a theme, it's like... 471 00:20:08,504 --> 00:20:10,373 Oh, I'm sorry. 472 00:20:10,374 --> 00:20:11,533 Was I talking too much? 473 00:20:11,534 --> 00:20:13,373 What a cunt! 474 00:20:13,374 --> 00:20:14,533 Uh, eyes on the prize, fat boy. 475 00:20:16,494 --> 00:20:18,364 Oh, shit. 476 00:20:19,444 --> 00:20:21,384 Uh, sorry, buddy. 477 00:20:44,364 --> 00:20:45,444 I'm alive? 478 00:20:46,524 --> 00:20:49,523 I'm alive! 479 00:20:50,368 --> 00:20:52,463 I just wanna say sorry for the mix-up. 480 00:20:52,464 --> 00:20:55,423 We have no record of your arrest or why you're here, 481 00:20:55,424 --> 00:20:57,373 so we're legally required to let you go. 482 00:20:57,374 --> 00:20:58,553 - Oh. - But the good news is 483 00:20:58,847 --> 00:21:01,068 this little snafu has ruffled enough feathers 484 00:21:01,069 --> 00:21:02,932 that we're finally gonna get the funding we need 485 00:21:02,957 --> 00:21:06,213 to ensure a safe and secure prison moving forward. 486 00:21:06,369 --> 00:21:07,862 Guess it worked out after all, huh? 487 00:21:13,957 --> 00:21:15,670 Ahem. After all, 488 00:21:15,671 --> 00:21:19,630 if someone as unathletic and mentally dull as yourself 489 00:21:19,631 --> 00:21:20,948 broke into our prison and then got out... 490 00:21:20,949 --> 00:21:23,059 Yeah, all right, I don't need the whole explanation, okay? 491 00:21:23,084 --> 00:21:25,122 I just wanna go home, have a hot toddy, 492 00:21:25,123 --> 00:21:27,416 put this high-profile case on my website. 493 00:21:28,012 --> 00:21:29,902 Uh, no, we can't let you do that. 494 00:21:29,927 --> 00:21:31,072 Testimonial? 495 00:21:31,073 --> 00:21:32,102 Sorry. 496 00:21:32,103 --> 00:21:34,062 - Can I get paid? - No. 497 00:21:34,063 --> 00:21:36,653 - Ah. - But thank you for your service. 498 00:21:36,749 --> 00:21:39,122 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure. 499 00:21:39,123 --> 00:21:40,153 Yeah. 500 00:21:42,734 --> 00:21:45,564 Inmate, package! 501 00:21:46,953 --> 00:21:50,992 Hey, G. As promised, my end of the bargain. P. 502 00:21:51,017 --> 00:21:53,976 "50 Shades of Green" by S.E. Tabernacle. 503 00:21:53,977 --> 00:21:56,836 Audio recording by Kevin Pacalioglu. 504 00:21:56,837 --> 00:21:58,856 Seduction. 505 00:21:58,857 --> 00:21:59,926 "Anastasia was 506 00:21:59,927 --> 00:22:01,026 a painfully shy girl. 507 00:22:01,027 --> 00:22:02,896 She always had been. 508 00:22:02,897 --> 00:22:05,846 At times in her life, she'd often mistaken"...